Surviving Coachella

In about 15 days I will soon be surrounded by thin, fresh faced, tanned, beautiful, super hip and super annoying young people -- thousands of them... but I am still excited about seeing the bands.

(This is a photo I took last year on my way to Coachella)

If you're going to Coachella here are some survival tips. These tips are especially those for the age of 25 and up.

Surviving Coachella:

Basics:
1.) Bring a lot of cash.
2.) Bring a lot of sunscreen.
3.) Bring a lot of hand sanitizer. The porter potties at Coachella do not have water and soap, only foam hand sanitizer. Having your own hand sanitizer to use before you eat will make you less grossed out and will save you a trip from going to the porter potty section.
4.) Bring a hat with a large rim. No matter how old or touristy you think you look, your face will thank you for not having a sunglasses tan.
5.) Don't try to push your way to the stage. You do not want to get in an elbow match with 20 year old boys.
6.) Coachella is amazing when the sun sets so remember that when you feel huge regret while standing under the scorching sun in the 120 degree heat.

Surviving the Crowd:
You will be surrounded by extremely good looking kids who are practically naked. When you begin to feel insecure and un-hip just remember the following:
1.) They are young and stupid, you are older and wiser.
2.) They will get a horrible orange tan and possibly skin cancer from showing too much skin.
3.) You have more money than they do because you have a job, which means you can afford to buy dozens of $3.00 cold bottle waters while they stand in the long line for free water from a drinking fountain. I encourage you to rub this in their face as much as possible.
4.) If you were bringing pot, you'd have better quality pot than they do why? Because you have more money.
5.) When one of the bands does a cover of a Bob Dylan or Guns N Roses song, you will actually know where the song originated and they won't. (Although, that might annoy me)
6.) Try to find a spot where there are people your age and chill there for a bit because it will make you feel normal and sane again.
7.) Remember that you are there because you LOVE live music and amazing performances that are not captured on CD's are what you live for.

spring forward, online dating and transformation into a slut

Spring forward has completely messed up my schedule, but that is not why I blog tonight. I have been doing some thinking-- some self reflecting (which by the way I don't really like to do because it doesn't always end happy). I have previously expressed about how bored I am with my life and how I need to shake things up. At this time, I cannot look for another job so there is nothing I can do about that. I could try online dating again and hopefully this time I won't be lazy about it. I figure, why not? It beats sitting at home wishing I had someone to talk to about what's on t.v., movies, people's ridiculous Facebook updates and simply to just talk about the day. It would also beat blogging about how bored I am and would certainly provide for better blogging topics. I just need to figure out if I want to try eHarm again or go with something else. Also, I am cheap and I refuse to pay full price for eHarm -- free would be great.

Since I am on the topic of changing things up, for the past 14 days I have been obsessing over the amount of calories I consume. I can proudly report that I have shed 4.5 pounds. That may not seem much, but seeing the scale actually go down is a billion times better than seeing it go up every year. The thing I like about my method instead of a fad diet like Weight Watchers is I have the freedom to eat whatever I want and I don't have to convert anything into some wacky point system. Also, I feel like WW is trying to turn me into a vegetarian and I resent that. The key to my method is portion control and exercise extra for things like a cookie or a beer or two. The weight loss is slow, but I would much rather live in a world where I lose weight slowly and still be able to eat bacon than lose weight quickly and eat nothing but 200 calorie frozen dinners.

Anyway, if or when I ever get hot, I'm totally going to start wearing slutty clothes and post slutty photos of myself on eHarm.