liquid jet black eye liner and onions don't mix

I have very sensitive eyes which is why I try to avoid the people at the make up counter from giving me a "free" makeover because my eyes start to water incessantly the minute they start putting on the eye shadow. They also always put on too much make up and I walk away looking like a Bangkok hooker and $100 charged up on my credit card on bright blue eye shadow. I am a marketer's dream.

I recently bought Benefit's Magic Ink Jet Black Liquid Liner and I can't say I love it. It turns out you have to have the hands of a surgeon to put on the liner otherwise you end up looking like you put it on in a moving car.

If you have sensitive eyes like me I don't recommend this liner especially if you are going to cut onions because it results in this...

 I cry a lot every single time I have to cut an onion, which is why I've decided to buy this...

Onion goggles (in pink) which are suppose to prevent me from crying. I have a friend who bought a pair a while ago and I laughed at her but perhaps she's laughing at me now. I am desperate and willing to spend $19.99. I'll let you know if they actually work.