extras

When we go about our daily routine we interact with the same people; our co-workers, our classmates, our families -- the people who are the main characters in our lives. There are also the people, the extras, we see everyday who we interact with minimally -- a superficial "Hey, how's it going?" while standing in the elevator or a small smile while passing each other in the halls. By the way, I try to only ask people questions like "How's it going?" or "How are you?" when I genuinely care about how they are doing. I try to not ask that of people I don't know because who knows when someone answers, "It's not going well. My wife just left me and she took our dog with her." Then you'd have to say, "I'm really sorry, I hope things work out" then you are stuck listening to a stranger go on and on about their misery while you are trying to go about your day. Trust me. I am speaking from experience. This has happened to me before.

Anyway, I digress. Back to the extras.

About three times a week I run into this lady near my office -- well she approaches me -- panicked and desperate with a different story every time about why she needs money. She is not homeless. In fact she lives right next door to my building (in a nice location) in a low-income rehabilitation home. Perhaps she is a recovering meth addict because I once read somewhere that recovering meth addicts dress like they are stuck in the 90s (not My So Called Life trendy 90s, more like the movie The Fighter 90s) and she kind of dresses like that. She wears her hair in a half pony tail held high with a scrunchy and she wears old denim jackets. Her signature style is sweat pants, bright green sweat pants that I can spot two blocks away.

Also, about once a week (or depending on how often I go out for beers after work) I see this older guy at one of the nearby bars I frequent. There are a lot of regulars at this bar, but I see this guy at other bars (which makes sense because we likely have the same taste in beer). He is tall kind of slender, long gray hair pulled back in a pony tail. I have never spoken a word to this guy,  I don't even think a single "hello" but whenever I see him he acknowledges my presence. He smiles or waves or nods his head when he sees me. I do the same and this has been going on for months -- maybe even a year.

Well the point of all of this is that I sometimes think about the extras and wonder if they somehow play a really small but someday significant role in my life.

up close and personal

Have you ever seen a giant zit up close and personal?
Well, now you have.
Does this photo gross you out? Make you uncomfortable because it's so close its like we're making out? If the answer is yes, I have served my purpose for the day. If the answer is no, keep staring.

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Owning It

Today I wore a lace blouse with a pearl necklace. Perhaps I have been watching too much Boardwalk Empire because I have this 1920s hooker-vibe going on... but that's okay because I am wearing this outfit and I am owning it.

If there is anything I have learned from watching seven seasons of Project Runway or listening to the mindless chatter of the botoxed hosts of the Style Network, that is apparently you can wear just about anything and get away with it as long as you "own it." I am not exactly sure what "owning it" means but I think it translates to "as long as you wear it with confidence the other bitches are going to be jealous of you." Just take a look at how Lady Gaga wears her drag queen face? She owns it and now she's a star.

One of the things I have always wanted to do (more than once) is to rock my pj's, bathrobe or night gown to the grocery store and OWN. IT.

handicap sections and other reserved spaces

I have spent a significant amount of time and  money going to concerts and I have to say that those who are handicapped almost always have the best seats in the house. I recently went to a Peter Gabriel concert at the Greek Theater in Berkeley and the handicapped section was at the perfect distance, next to the seats that look like stone thrones (which I'm sure were much more expensive seats). At music festivals, the handicap area is also the best seats on the field. They get their own section, their own private port-a-potty. I know, I know, it's more difficult for them to get around but have you ever stood for 4 hours at a concert where the floor is steel and everyone around you is a foot or more taller so all you can see are the shoulders of everyone around you, awkwardly swaying? I have and that is the scene at almost every concert I have attended. I know, I am such a bitch. I feel like I am growing devil horns as I type.

Since I am on this rant, has anyone seen those parking spaces reserved for pregnant women? Are you kidding me?! Some places call it "Stork" parking. Pregnant women suffer from swollen feet, hot flashes, etc... well it kinda sounds like stuff overweight people suffer from too, so why not make a special parking spot for them? That of course would never fly because everyone will say they need to park far so they can get the exercise. Pregnancy is a choice (yes, even if the condom broke or your pill failed you knew about that .05-.01 chance of getting knocked up) and people need to live with the choices they make-- even if that means walking that gigantic belly from the far end of the parking lot to the store.

When you've got a sentimental heart

I am adding another thing to my list of things I am going to try not to do as I am older and wiser; Do not put sentimental value on objects. This may sound heartless because I know people like to keep their first teddy bear, first sock, first underwear, etc. but these things are perishable and when we lose them it only ends in heartache... and for what? Objects. Objects that are typically useless and can be replaced.

I recently lost a bangle I absolutely loved but not because of how it looked or fit, but because it once belonged to my mother. The bracelet was not of any value expect of value to me. Now, it is gone and whenever I think about it I get sad but I just have to remind myself that it is only a bracelet and I can always buy another one.

This photo is what's left of my bracelet. It was gold and all around had the word Peace in different languages.

addict.

I am addicted. To my phone. To the apps of my phone. To socia media. I sometimes wish all of my devices would actually break so I will be forced to be disconnected for a while... to not know what people are up to and to not feel the need to tell people what I am up to, wondering what people are up to. Of course I say this as I am blogging on my phone using the blogger app.

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Mistakes - Part I (because there will be plenty more to be made)

I am going to be one year older this month and I have put together a list of mistakes I have made in my twenties (some more than others) and vow to never do them as I get older and wiser. For convenience, I put them into categories.

In the Kitchen...

1.) Don't try to make your own fondant.

Even Martha Stewart doesn't make her own fondant. This will only end in a huge mess and a lot of cursing.

2.) Don't get the urge to bake at 10 o'clock in the evening and expect to go to work the next morning.

In Fashion...

3.) Just because it is the latest trend, does not mean you should wear it. 

I can't tell you how many times I have tried on skinny jeans thinking it will look great on me. I have even bought a pair and thank God I have enough sense not to wear it. Me from the waist down should never wear skinny jeans. In fact, they really should stop producing skinny jeans once it passes a certain size.

4.) Just because it is expensive does not mean it will make you look good (or rich).

It turns out you can't buy style or class. One thousand dollar boots paired with a leopard metal studded dress will still make you look like a cheap hooker (but if that's the look you're going for then go for it, which brings me to my next section)

In Life and Love/Romance/Etc...

5.) Don't be so judgmental because people might pleasantly surprise you.

Maybe the old lady in the hooker outfit isn't trying to get attention or act and look ten years younger.

6.) Don't assume you mean more to someone unless that person has specifically said it.

I think this is a mistake women make more than men. This one is difficult because when we really like someone we hope they feel the same way and we somehow convince ourselves that they do. It is a hard lesson to learn. Beyonce sings about it and even though she is singing about a guy, it goes both ways (Cue Music: Beyonce's "Irreplaceable").

7.) Don't assume you are irreplaceable at work.

8.) Don't focus on making a lot of money.

(Cue Music: T.I and Rihanna "Live Your Life"). 

Rapper T.I. said it best, just live your life instead of chasing that paper. Word.

9.) Don't worry about things you can't control.

You can't control what other people do (despite what you have said or done), you can't control situations around you and you can't always control things that may or may not happen to your health... so, focus that worry on something more productive like knitting, karate or watching countless hours of television.

10.) Don't underestimate what you can do or accomplish.

I know I vowed to try to not make these mistakes... but here's to another year of making mistakes and enjoying the ride.