Tuesday, July 3, 2012

i need your help (with my first world problem)

After reading trending hashtag topics on Twitter for an hour tonight, I suddenly realized filling out my match.com profile would make it a more productive night. I managed to be hungover at 10:00 p.m., so what better way to cure that than to drink some more. So here I am, staring at my empty match.com profile and I'm drawing a blank. I hate filling out these things, I feel like I am taking an exam always second guessing my answers. The very first question they ask is why I am on match.com. The answer options ranged from, my friends friend met the love of their life here to I'm just here to look, I'm not sure I'll join. Why is the "I'm here because I'm drunk, lonely, feeling sorry for myself so I need to feel liked again" not an option? Let's face it, that is the only reason why people ever join any online dating site (that and women who feel like their ovaries are drying up).

So far, I have answered most of the easy multiple choice questions but I am having a hard time with the constructed response questions. This is a plea for help.

1.) What should my "Dating Headline" read? So far mine reads:
"I'm just here to get laid. Just kidding. I will come back to this when I can craft something witty and brilliant."

2.) What type of photos should I use? Should I use more than one but I don't really want to. I am uncomfortable posting 20 photos of just myself in one album. I want to be truthful about how I look in these photos (so no filters) but at the same time, I also don't want to look terrible (as in triple chins, shiny face and giant zits).

3.) Should I care about how much money the dude makes? I put no preference, but I also don't want to get stuck with the bill all the time. I'm ok with paying for myself, but if I always have to pay for two people, I would get annoyed. However, do I want to limit myself?

That's all for now.






2 comments:

  1. Oh good lord. I go out of town for a week and you get all wild online. How do you function without me?

    1) "Ovaries are drying up, get them before they shrivel and turn to dust"

    2) All 90's style glamour shots.

    3) Of course you care how much the dude makes. Any dude that is content making nothing isn't going to be able to do the fun things you like to do. If he can't pay for his own beer, there is a problem. Plus you don't want to use up all of his allowance money (because he's obviously stilling living with his mom).

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  2. I'm so glad your back to keep me in line.

    1.) So, in a recession (and trying to pay off credit cards), the price of finding a "match" seems like too high a price to pay at the moment... so... I'm still on the fence.

    2.) I'm pretty sure Glamour Shots at the mall closed down, so photos of myself infront of a bathroom mirror will have to do.

    3.) You make an excellent point. Plus we can't both be poor.

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